Reverse Culture Shock

Well, it hit! I wasn’t certain that it would as our arrival to Colorado seemed to be full of nothing but joy. Yet, on Saturday we all felt hit strongly with reverse culture shock. We were down in Denver and for some reason it hit all of us on the same day. Possibly it was because we were with our friends from Brazil and yet on the same day dealing with the frantic American schedule. Our time with Eduardo and Priscila was so precious. We sat on their floor and talked about God and family. We played with their baby and just spent unhurried time together.

We were overwhelmed with their generosity in the giving of their furniture but yet in the same way it was just “ordinary” Latin culture generosity and a generosity that became part of our lives in Mexico and will be with us forever. In Mexico we watched thousands upon thousands of dollars of our belongings being given away as we opened wide our doors to our neighbors and had two free giving days. This was such a blessing to our hearts and it flowed so naturally within the Mexico culture. Here we are in Colorado and a Brazilian couple has given us all of their beautiful furniture. So the flow of generosity continues. In the Latin cultures generosity is not limited to a once in a lifetime unusual event but it is a way of life. Money flows into your life and money flows out towards other people. Among the common people, of whom we were a part of, money just flows freely between everyone. It isn’t a government rule or tax but generosity is a cultural value and is so clearly evident upon touching your feet upon Mexican soil.

In any case, the generosity of Priscila and Eduardo from Brazil were a part of that Latin generous spirit. God gives to man and man gives to God. In other words, man gives to his fellow man because God has given freely to him in the blessings of this life. It’s a beautiful cultural value and one that we Americans could learn a lot from. I’ve seen a person who barely had enough to buy one day’s worth of tortillas, see someone on the bus who was less fortunate than them and they would be sticking pesos in their hands and giving them a hug. When Gary died our neighbors, who live in tiny concrete houses and are very poor by American standards, came by in masses putting pesos in our hands which equaled the $2,ooo usd to pay for Gary’s cremation! We learned through amazing experiences that it is impossible to out give a Mexican person. And it doesn’t hint at all of trying to outdo each other. In some bizarre way they always feel that they haven’t done enough. We had this demonstrated countless times in the two years that we lived in Mexico. Just when we thought no one could give more to us there would be another out pouring of love and generosity. The four of us learned to walk in the flow of it all. It wasn’t that if Carlos and Susana gave to us that we had to give back to them but it was a flowing throughout the whole country. Carlos and Susan would give to us in some way and then we would cook a meal for a neighbor. And then Oscar and Silvia would give to us and then we would give to someone in the market. The money flows throughout everyone and everyone is taken care of.

This is an example of a country without welfare and without government income. I would say it is a much better way to exist where every member of the country is incredibly generous to his fellow man. What terrifies me in the economic reform that so many are lobbying for is that I don’t see the generosity easily flowing among American people. It is a lesson that we better learn if we do not want our income taxed to give to the poor. Giving unreservedly to the poor is clearly a Biblical principal and one that I am passionate about.

In any case, we were thoroughly immersed within the Latin culture once again as we sat on Priscila and Eduardo’s floor. And then the stress hit regarding moving the furniture into storage space until we get our own home. The details of this situation are not important but what struck Nathaniel, Bethany and I so strongly was reverse culture shock. I felt like Nathaniel, Bethany and I were suspended in some other cultural zone while the American people rush here and there and here and there with barely time to breath in-between appointments. It was so shocking to us that we nearly felt like we were going to have a cross-cultural meltdown right in the middle of our own country! That my friend is called reverse culture shock! Where a person who has lived abroad has integrated some of their adopted countries values into their life and therefore when they go back to their passport country, they feel strange and out of place. It’s a very confusing emotion because a third culture person realizes that they no longer really fit in anywhere. They are strangers in their adopted country and they are strangers in their home country. And so goes the life of missionaries and those who have made a foreign country their home and not just a place to do business for a couple of years.
 

Nathaniel articulated it so clearly when he said, “Mom, we need about ten Mexican friends! Maybe we should move to Greely!” lol So yes, living in Windsor and being close to Greely wouldn’t be a bad idea. We went to a Mexican restaurant for lunch which was soothing to our cross-cultural sensitivities. I don’t know where God will place us in our future but we do know that the Latino culture is inexorably part of our heart and soul.