Journey to Mitford

This spring in the Moore home, as the relentless snow and rain continued to fall, Nathaniel, Bethany and I began to read the Mitford Series books. Until this winter I had never heard of Mitford or Jan Karon the author. These books have captivated our hearts and brought an unusual sense of encouragement into our lives.

The main character, “Father Tim” is an Episcopal priest. What many of you do not realize is that even though Gary went to a very traditional conservative Bible school he finished his ministry education at an Episcopal seminary in Pittsburgh! Gary never felt called to jump through the hoops in order to become an ordained Episcopal priest but a lot of the references in the book remind me of things that Gary shared with me about his days teaching as a parish priest in order to fulfill his seminary requirements.

It is a very spiritual series of books where the author makes no hesitation to weave the gospel message throughout the delightful happenings in the fictitious town of Mitford, North Carolina. If I were ever to finally sit down and put pen to paper, these are the type of books that I would write. The whole process of reading these has been very inspirational for me on many levels.

One thing that I have found delightful is that the main character, Timothy, is in his early sixties and finds the love of his life in Cynthia his next door neighbor. The unfolding of their relationship is central to the first three books and perfectly mirrors the type of relationship that I am comfortable with. Timothy and Cynthia were close friends before they ever went out on a “date”. The whole idea of dating a stranger sends shivers of fear up my back and sounds foreign and terrifying. However, with Timothy and Cynthia it happened naturally and in a very Godly and pure way. Yet, their relationship was not without real life struggles and obstacles to their eventual marriage.

In some unusual way these fictitious characters have been a big source of encouragement for me. You see, my only frame of reference to being single is who I was when I met Gary. I was still living with my parents.

I was very young, carefree, naïve, and honestly very immature in many ways. As I think about being “single” now that my beloved husband has died, that picture of who I once was just doesn’t make sense to me. How can I go back and be that silly blond haired girl who didn’t have a care in the world or an ounce of sense or maturity? Yet, when I get a glimpse of love through Father Tim and his relationship with Cynthia, I see how love can happen later in life without reverting back and becoming a 40 something teenager! Jan Karon, does a wonderful presentation of mature and Godly love that is not lacking in passion and delight for one another.

This was one aspect of Gary’s and my marriage that was unique. As our love matured, we never lost the simple, yet remarkable pleasure of being head over heels in love with each other. We would look at other couples our age, or those who had been married as long as we had, and they all seemed as though the passion and pleasure had long since disappeared from their lives. We worked hard at making sure that we never took each other for granted or that we never lost the delight that we had in being married to each other.

We greatly enjoyed the simple pleasure of lighting a few candles, turning on a jazz CD and eating Chinese takeout together. Sometimes our kiddos would get in on the “event” and would set a beautiful table for us, with candles and goblets and our pretty dishes, while Gary and I “dressed” for dinner. I would wear my clingy deep purple dress that swirled around real pretty when I danced and he would wear his handsome tweed jacket with his special blue hued tie. During dinner we would share our hearts and souls with each other and then he would take me in his arms and dance with me.
 

Other times we would have a picnic together outside in “Mooreview Park” under our blossoming apple tree, relaxing swing and blooming flowers. No matter what the day or what the plans were, we were always very deeply and passionately in love. Even when we were arguing, and YES we did have some whoppers of fights, we still melted when we looked at each other and always walked in the pleasure and passion of our deep and Godly love. Even when we were at the gym together, covered in sweat and determination, Gary would walk past me and whisper, “Hey babe” softly in my ear as he walked to the next weight set.

This is what I so appreciate about the Mitford books. Father Tim and Cynthia aren’t too old to have passion and pleasure in their marriage. I was afraid that there wasn’t anyone else in the whole world that would be older and wiser yet not have lost the enchantment and delight in being in love and the enjoyment walking through this crazy life together! Of course these are fictitious characters but it still gives me hope. Hope that there can be delightful love at a later age in life. And that this older love doesn’t have to be leftovers like a meatloaf ignored in the back of the refrigerator! Who wants a leftover meatloaf marriage! I want a sizzling Habanero carne asada marriage, with spiritual depth and intricacies of flavor!

So as we continue our journey through “Mitford” God will continue to use these books as a great encouragement in my life. This is the type of love that God blessed me with in Gary and this is the type of love that he will bless me with in my future. Jan Karon is a very talented author. She brought Father Tim and Cynthia together. But my God is the all powerful author of my life and he will orchestrate it in ways that I could not even begin to hope or imagine. What an exciting life we lead in obedience to our father God!